Why You're Already Worthy (Despite What You've Been Told)

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Transcript

Ep 004: Why You're Already Worthy (Despite What You've Been Told)

SPEAKERS

Annie Bauer

00:04

The business owners who stay in it for the long haul and experienced the highest degree of success and profit, know how to stay steady and keep moving forward strategically no matter what the market throws their way. This podcast the smart better life is my record documenting what has worked for me and the clients I have helped from the first client and the first dollar to your goal of a million dollars and beyond every stage of your business brings a new set of challenges, it would be greatly appreciated if you share this with someone who could benefit. Together we can build a lot more than going it alone, listen and enjoy. 

00:37

In 1927, there was a young man of 32, who contemplated taking his own life so that his family could benefit from the life insurance payout. He had lost his job had no savings and he had a family to care for including a newborn baby girl.

00:55

There are claims written in some texts that, during this time, he experienced a profound incident that instead gave him direction and purpose for his life. It has been written that a voice came to him and told him, "You belong to the universe. Your significance will remain forever obscure to you, but you may assume that you are fulfilling your role if you apply yourself to converting your experiences to the highest advantage of others."

01:23

 It is said that the experience led to a re-evaluation of his life and that he decided to see what a single individual could contribute to changing the world and benefiting all of humanity. 

01:33

That man was Buckminster Fuller.

01:37

And good for us that this experience transformed his life because he went on to develop 25 patents, write nearly 30 books, and receive 47 honorary doctorate degrees. He traveled the world lecturing and committing himself to pioneer solutions that would improve human lives.

01:55

One of the most familiar inventions that "Bucky ", as he was sometimes called by those who knew him well, gave us was the geodesic dome. If that term doesn't sound familiar to you, you might recognize the architectural design if you've ever visited Spaceship Earth at Epcot Center in Disney World, Florida.

02:14

Think of the words that came to Buckminster's mind when he was at rock bottom, wondering how to go on and probably contemplating his purpose and very existence: 

02:26

"You belong to the universe, your significance will remain forever obscure to you. But you may assume that you are fulfilling your role if you apply yourself to converting your experience to the highest advantage of others."

02:42

This is one of the most profound and important lessons I have learned in my own life. And I've learned it from scholars, mentors, and teachers. Deciding to believe in my own inherent worth, just by virtue of being here and being born, changed everything for me. And teaching this principle to my clients is now impacting them as well. 

03:09

In our society, we're often taught that our worth is conditional, performance-based, fleeting, and dependent on the external, like other people, cultural rules, institutional standards, and more. I can't tell you how many clients I have--regardless of their age, or demographics, or any other factor--who struggle with this at some level. And I was particularly rooted in the belief myself that my own worth was tied to my performance, especially how I performed for others, even if it felt like I was abandoning my own soul in the process. 

03:47

We have deeply held beliefs that we think are truths that are worth is not inherent. 

03:55

But let me suggest some ideas and evidence that you are inherently worthy, just as you are right now, without having to do or be or change anything. Here are some ideas that have radically changed my own relationship with myself. And from a place of knowing my own worth, I'm able to create a different life. 

04:21

The first one is this: you're worthy just because you were born. You belong to the universe. The real reason you're here might not be fully clear to you, but you belong here because you were born. You don't need to perform, get the A, or get the blue ribbon in order to be worthy. Its part miracle and part mystery that we exist like we do as humans. And somewhere in there is a magic or spirit, whatever you want to call it or believe in based on your traditions and your concept of "soul". It's your worth and your reason for being here. I think it's why most of humanity seeks to answer the question, "What's my purpose? We even know from psychological evidence and research that finding a Purpose and a Meaning in our lives gives us more fulfillment, satisfaction, and contentment. 

05:17

I studied with a man named Dr. Dick Schwartz, and he's currently serving on the faculty at Harvard Medical School. I consider him one of my mentors and trainers. And he's the famous founder of a method called IFS. He has found over four decades of his research and work that all of his clients and everyone he's encountered have, at the core of themselves, the Self with a capital S. He has been able to boil down self to these eight characteristics, which I call the eight C's. 

05:57

The eight C's are Calm, Clarity, Compassion, Confidence, Connectedness, Courage, Creativity, and Curiosity. I'll repeat those again. Calm, clarity, compassion, confidence, connectedness, courage, creativity, and curiosity. 

06:25

Jonathan Van Ness, who's the co star of one of my favorite shows Queer Eye, and also the author of the book Over the Top says that this centered self with a capital S is, quote, "perfect and whole and can handle anything". 

06:43

The second concept I want to share with you is you're worthy now, just exactly the way you are. In the book, Gifts of Imperfection, Brene Brown writes, "If we want to fully experience love and belonging, we must believe that we are worthy of love and belonging. When we can let go of what other people think, and our own story of what people think, then we gain access to our worthiness, the feeling that we are enough, just as we are, and that we are worthy of love and belonging."

07:27

She goes on to talk about all the ways we say or think "I'll be worthy IF" or "I'll be worthy WHEN". But her message is this: You are worthy. Now, as is.  You don't need to do or think or be there is no "if" clause, there's no "when" clause, to just start from a place of worth. What if you could hold on to that thought, until it became such a strong core belief that you never doubted your worth?

08:04

The third thing I want you to know is that you have something to share. And this makes you worthy to others as well. You're unique, your set of experiences, trials and tribulations have given you a perspective and wisdom that no one else has. It's your gift. And I might, daresay even your obligation, to share it with others. Now, keep in mind, this is not your own self worth based on what others think, but sharing your worth with others. 

08:39

For me, being able to take events in my life, the hardships I've encountered, and even really difficult people in my life and turn them into wisdom has given the struggles that I've had meaning. I like to say I've been forged in the fire of Difficulty. And I can be there for others now who are going through their own transformations and lessons because I've been there. I've walked that path. And those struggles have helped me so that I can help others. I can bring my worth through my experiences, my trials and tribulations, and share it with others through wisdom and knowledge and sharing my story.

09:30

The fourth thing I want to share with you is that you have infinite potential. This is just how we are made. And how do I know this? Because your brain never ever stops learning, growing and evolving. Even up to the moment you die. At every level of new growth, then there's a new you with new wisdom and knowledge (and potential) to share. Who you are and what you can do has no finite end as long as you're here. 

10:05

We could even surmise that you make an impact on the world, for better or for worse, that has some sort of effect that is left behind, even after you're gone. That means that your infinite potential lives on indefinitely. We get to decide then, "How are we going to direct the course of our lives?" You get to choose right now what you want to do with your potential and how you want to direct it. But it is, indeed, infinite. 

10:44

Last, I want to share with you the fifth and final thing. You learn from your mistakes. We often think that we aren't worthy because we've made mistakes in our lives. But actually, our worth increases because of our mistakes, or the things that didn't work out in our lives or businesses when we choose to learn from them. All the mistakes each come with the experience of you having gone through them. You can shortcut the time and friction then for someone else.

11:26

So finally, I want to just close with this. So how do you do this? How do you take these five principles that I just presented that are proof that you're worthy. five beliefs that you could start believing today, even just trying them on for a little bit, and start believing that you're worthy? You could just decide, just decide. I tell my clients this all the time. You could just decide right now not to believe all the stories about your unworthiness and just start to believe, "I'm worthy". 

12:04

The second thing you could do is hang around more people who believe you're worthy and make it a point to tell you so. That was one of the biggest changes I made in my own life. I started choosing people who actually believed in my worth, didn't make it performance based, and did make a point to show up and tell me that I was worthy. 

12:26

The third thing that you could do is find someone who's an expert who helps people strengthen their belief in themselves, helps them overcome negative thinking patterns, and helps people break through their mental blocks so that they can succeed. 

12:43

The fourth and final thing that I want to leave you with is this. Trust yourself. Trust your innate worth. And trust that you have something to share. Trust that the universe has a plan for you. Like Buckminster Fuller did. 

13:05

And I'll leave you with this quote, from page 24 of The Alchemist, my all time favorite book. "There is one great truth on this planet, whoever you are, or whatever it is that you do, when you really want something, it's because that desire originated in the Soul of the Universe. It's your mission on earth."

13:27

And here's my thought to go with it. Believe that you are worthy. That you did originate in the Soul of the Universe, and therefore your worth is inherent, and not determined by others or external factors. What would happen in your life and the lives of others if you truly leaned in to this belief? What could you create from a place of worth? How much better and stronger would you be to commit to your mission on earth and what you could accomplish, who you could impact, and how you might make a difference? 

14:10

Something to think about. You are worthy. The world's just waiting for you to shine and share all that you have that is uniquely you to make the world a better place.