Separating Your Self-Worth from Your Work

business life mastery podcast
Ep 005: Separating Your Wortmiddle aged woman in professional attire looking confident with a smile and a thumbs-up

Getting our identity wrapped up in our businesses is not healthy.

Our concept of our worthiness--who we are as individuals-- is measured by our work's performance. This is not good for you . . . or your business.

It doesn't matter if you're making your first $5 or you're on your way to your first $500,000.

At any revenue level, it's easy to fall into a trap of getting our self-worth all wrapped up in our business.

Here's how to recognize it, see how it might be affecting you, and what to do instead.

 


 

 

 

Your Brand Is Not YOU

A lot of people out there--particularly if you're a solopreneur or a creator--are creating what's called a personal brand.

This means that your whole company is branded and formed around your name: your story, your journey, and the things that you've overcome. Then your brand transfers that knowledge to other people.  Personal brands are very different than marketing a product.

People are buying a journey with you, and they often need to identify with your story and your unique experiences.

As business owners, we are using those pieces of our own journey as part of our brand IP--our intellectual property.

But we very often can fall into the trap of thinking that because our IP is infused into the business that the business IS us.

When things don't work in our business, we can tend to look at it as a personal rejection.

It sounds like this in our heads:

  • "I suck."
  • "No one wants to work with me."
  • "There are better people out there doing this."
  • "People want to work with others in my space and not me."

Often, the result of self-talk like this is checking out of our business for days, weeks, or even months.

It can also look like constantly changing to a new idea, product, service, or different industry altogether.

Sometimes, unfortunately, for a lot of creators and entrepreneurs it means just quitting and giving up entirely.

 

CEO Energy vs. CE-Me Energy

As solopreneurs or small business owners, we don't usually see ourselves as CEOs.

We haven't been groomed to be CEO's. So we aren't working from that identity.  We are just out there sharing our products and services or teaching some particular system or something that worked for us.

We're often working alone, too.  Which makes it even harder to embody a "leader of a company" attitude.

We don't see ourselves as running a business, a company, a corporation, an LLC.

We are showing up in CE-Me Energy . . . not CEO Energy.

The problem with CE-Me Energy is that is that we're hanging our entire self image on every project, every decision, or every webinar. Then it's this self-defeating cycle of thinking that things failing in our businesses is about us.

That makes us less inclined to produce more when we come at it with that kind of thought of "this is all about me".

On the flip side, when something goes well, and something succeeds, we also think it's about us.

 

How to Be a CEO

The CEO looks at the business as, well, a business.  Nothing more, nothing less.

CEO's know they're in the business of finding solutions to problems.

The PHAEA (pronounced "Fay") Method is one of the ways I stay in a CEO mindset. In this way, I focus on finding problems, figuring out what could be a possible solution, and running "experiments" to see what works . . . and what doesn't.

Use my PHAE method:

  • Problem--See the problem in your business that needs solving
  • Hypothesis--Develop a hypothesis around what you think would work as a solution
  • Action--Take action in accordance with that hypothesis
  • Evaluate--Evaluate to see what worked and what didn't and adjust
  • Action--Take new, revised actions based on what you learned

Do this on repeat.

Also, notice how "Action" is a primary driver here.  Not endless thinking, analysis paralysis, or hesitation.  Move through all these steps with efficiency and precision.

Execute fast.

 

Great Business Owners See "Selling" Differently

A lot of us are great at what we do . . . but we don't like marketing and selling our products and services.

It really boils down to the way we perceive "selling".

We often cringe at the thought of getting a "no" because we see a prospect's "no" as personal rejection. But looking at sales this way is a thought error. We're coming from the thought of "If someone says no, that means they're saying no to me".

What we don't understand about sales and marketing is that when someone says no, it's usually not about us personally.

It often means more about what's going on with that prospect:

  • what's in their mind
  • why they may not be seeing the value of what you have to offer
  • and why they're saying no

Sales and marketing really should be looked at as an invitation to get curious and help.

Great selling is really just helping someone make the right decision that will help them the most.

 

TL;DR

Five Ways to Keep Your Worth (and Your Business Performance) Strong

  1. See your products, services, and brand as separate from you. You are presenting "You" in your marketing and as the face of your brand. But how you provide transformation to your clients is the real focus.
  2. Stay in CEO energy instead of CE-Me energy. This means asking better questions and being problem and solution focused.
  3. Develop an approach to business that uses my PHAEA method. See business as an experiment where you're constantly running Problem-Hypothesis-Action scenarios to make it better.
  4. Don't ask your business to be the source of your self worth.  Find that elsewhere.
  5. Invest in resources, relationships, and support that help you improve your self-concept as you uplevel. All great business owners have coaches, close friends and peers, and outside interests that help and support their growth . . . and this is a never-ending process.

 


 

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Annie Bauer, Founder of The Smart Better Life sitting in front of a stone wall in an orange blouse

Annie Bauer

AnnieĀ is a self-proclaimed passionate "geeky nerd-researcher" on all things related to living well, increasing our income, and realizing more of our potential. Drawing from psychology, neuroscience, business, and more, she teaches entrepreneurs, creators, and leaders how to build better brains so they can reach higher levels of financial freedom.

She enjoys sharing what she teaches in her YouTube videos, podcast episodes, and posts or articles online. Click your favorite platform below and drop her a "hello"!

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